TomSide. BayScott. Those two combinations just don’t have the same ring to it that the word BAYSIDE does. Yup. Kill some time and read our Bayside piece RIGHT NOW:

  1. Shudder (2008)

SW: Boy.

TK: Boy.

SW: This album is eleven years old. It IS a boy.

TK: This album is super stripped down and “simple,” in the best way ever. It IS a boy.

SW: No one understands boys. (pauses) Boy.

TK: Boy, I can’t go on. (pauses) Boy.

SW: Girl, same.

  1. Sirens and Condolences (2004)

TK: Debut.

SW: Debut.

TK: Masterpiece.

SW: Well, that’s my favorite song on this record. I listen to it if I’m bored or if there’s poison in my veins.

TK: Masterpiece dad joke.

SW: Just enough to love you, Tom. Just. Enough. To. Love. You.

TK: I hear a lot of Alkaline Trio in this album; I have more than just enough love for ALK3.

SW: I know that you missed the Alkaline Trio/Bayside/Off With Their Heads tour, and I feel sorry for you… Happy to provide alcohol and altar boys for you to cope with! (pauses) I PUT THE PUNK IN PUNCTUATION!

  1. Vacancy (2016)

TK: Mary.

SW: Mary.

TK: God, I’ve been dead all day. (pauses) With me, you’re DAD all day.

SW: (groans, yet respectfully) I hear it in your voice, Jesus. It’s not all there, per se. I feel a certain (pauses) vacancy.

TK: (shrugs)


TK: That joke was pretty vacant, Moses.

SW: We’re so pretty, we’re so pretty.

TK: Wrong band.

SW: Sex sells though! I watch Showgirls every night.

  1. Cult (2014)

TK: Pigsty.

SW: Pigsty.

TK: Smells like big cheese.

SW: Tom, your time has come. (pauses) Hate me, bitch.

TK: WOW. Just wow.

SW: That was the whitest lie. I love you. I also love this album. Like a lot. Like it should be #6 but we made it #5. I’m torn.

TK: Quit fucking stuttering.

4. Interrobang (2019)

SW: If you were nice, my prayers would be answered.

TK: Sorry.

SW: It’s cool, soldier. I can’t stay mad at you. Really. I can’t. You’re not in trouble anymore

TK: Good. That answers all of my prayers.

SW: Dude, you’re back in trouble. I already made a prayers dad joke/reference.

TK: It was such a religious experience hearing that joke (and this album; what a fucking album) that I wanted to do it again.

SW: Medication would help. (pauses) Fine. (pauses) I’ll raise my white flag.

TK: Good.


TK: Wanna know what’s great? “Interrobang”.

SW: (nods till his neck is numb)

TK: It’s so heavy and so melodic, but nothing is conventional Bayside. Nothing, I tell ya! I love to see a band that’s been around as long as Bayside has still strive to creatively challenge itself.

SW: Girl, same. You’re tall. Like really tall. Dear reader, if you don’t believe me, google “Tom Kunzman”. How do your long legs walk it off?

TK: (shakes head till his neck and legs are numb)

  1. Bayside (2005)

SW: Sorry.

TK: Sorry.

SW: Tom, we’ll be ok.

TK: Scott, I blame it on bad luck.

SW: In all seriousness, Beatz owned this record. His legacy lives on at every Bayside show because the band still plays at least a few songs from this record every night.

TK: Chris, the band’s current drummer, most certainly holds it down every night in memory.

  1. The Walking Wounded (2007)

SW: Duality.

TK: Duality.

SW: This was the very first Bayside album that I obsessed over.

TK: Same. This was the first Bayside record that caught my attention.

SW: Especially the lead guitar work. It STILL catches my attention. Carry on, Bayside. Carry on.

TK: Honestly, and don’t take this the wrong way, kids: Bayside isn’t a band of horses, it is a band of unicorns!

  1. Killing Time (2011)

SW: Sick.

TK: Sick.

SW: Sick.

This piece is already gone. Listen to this playlist; it fights most demons.